Tooth Fairy

April 30, 2009

Lucky for the Dude, his dad is a dentist so getting his chipped tooth fixed is no problem at all. We went into the office before hours and I got to play assistant to the Dude's dad :)






It's spring time and the flowers are too pretty to be ignored. The first one is at the office and the rest are at the Dude's house.








Some very nice people provided the Dude with some goods.


People don't know how big of an animal/insect/all-things-in-nature Lover the Dude is. And it's not just, "Aw I love this dog or cat." He loves all of the animals. It's really cute. He found this inch worm on his pants and named him Inchy. It's like he's one with nature. He let Inchy go after playing with him for half an hour.




Then the Dude's mom bought us dinner. How nice!

Picnic

April 29, 2009

on the roof with Matt and Kristin. I was too tired to cook so we got food from downstairs.









The Blowjob Boycott

via Street Boners.



"Our resident alien Arv turned us on to this article his friend did about eating pussy. Apparently she’s sick of not getting eaten out and has decided to call a blow job boycott.


Aileen,

The problem with getting eaten out is it’s so personal new dates often don’t want to go that far. I find sucking a dick way less intrusive than having a stranger go down on my piss hole. I’d rather save that for the honeymoon phase. Like, when we’re really digging each other, and he doesn’t care that I do number twos (I know, long ways away).

However, a lot of guys don’t do it because they know they suck at it, and they don’t want to get told to fuck off. Guys, here’s the secret to making us cum.

1- Make sure we want you to eat us out. That means head downstairs slowly, and if you feel any kind of pull up or hesitation come back up. If you know us well you can even ask us something hornly like, “You want me to lick your pussy?” No response means, “No thanks.”

2- Once you get down there start off SUPER SLOW. In fact, don’t even eat the meat. Start by teasing the inner thighs and shit. When you feel some real anticipation maybe then lay your tongue on the whole patch like a blanket.

3- Do not start speedy. I know you want to. I can feel it. But go as slow as you possibly can at the beginning. So slow it’s frustrating. You need to save all your speed demon stuff for the very very end and that means a long, slow climb to the top. Believe me. It pays off in the end because to go fast right out the gate can cost you dozens of minutes of us trying to catch up with you.

Anyway, I think being mad about a lack of pussy eating neglects the part where a lot of us aren’t ready for you to fuck that up – again. Once you’re both finally ready follow these 3 tips, and we’ll make sure your tip leaves fully emptied.

Love,
Donna



Here’s Aileen’s article:

GIVING UP ON GOING DOWN

Remember my earlier post and how I spent the entire day thinking about sex while trying to study? Well it happened again, and this time it started as soon as I got to work. Lana later experienced ovarian blues, and I apologized profusely. But what can I do? It seems now a days, she keeps being part of a bargain she has no gain in. One in which we both don’t win.

You can take this as a rant or whatever, but I’m taking back my gift. My close friends have been right, I am extremely generous and for what? For nothing I tell you. I’m referring to the gift of giving succulent, mind-numbing oral. I know it is a bit skanky on my part, but it’s something I enjoy doing on the right person. It gives me a weird satisfaction of knowing I can make you scream my name and leave you shaken and out of breath. In fact I get so into it turns me on because I’m expecting the same in return. Instead the guy either falls asleep like a baby from exhaustion or wants to have sex. What’s the problem you say? The problem is the fact that in the end I have yet to climax like you motherfucker. And there I am left alone still pining for more sex. The past two years have been like an inescapable nightmare.

At first I thought maybe I just have a hard time getting off, but after countless bathroom conversations with random drunken ladies and reading numerous scholarly articles it seems to be more of a global problem. It seems to me that most guys that don’t know how to get a lady off and don’t bother learning. For starters, foreplay is necessary to get things going because if you look at the facts it generally takes longer for a woman to reach that orgasmic bliss that makes sex worth it. Penetration can only take you so far, and I meant that literally because it takes one person where they want to go and that is the dude. Ladies need that clitoral stimulation, or at least a vibrating cock ring.

What’s more of a global problem is the fact that men are receiving without giving. So I say you join me in this protest and don’t give until you receive! Now these sexual conversations always tend to make an appearance at small gatherings, or are of topic amongst my male peers and it seems they avoid it because they don’t like fish. Seems to me they’ve had a bad experience or have yet to get an acquired taste. Let’s not forget that spunk doesn’t taste like a bowl of cold stone birthday cake concoction either.

I can’t speak on behalf of how other ladies tend to themselves, but I can and will speak for myself. I am low or no maintenance to hang with and expect the same from my friends and crushes, but when it comes to my body I am on top of my game. Brazilian waxes, kiegels, cute underwear, showering, exercise, healthy eating, and doctor visits to give me the satisfaction of knowing I’m clean. True some of these things I picked up from having to dress in front of strangers at runway shows and swimsuit gigs, but it only made me more aware of myself and damn baby I look and smell good! So why would “he” missed out on such an opportunity to make me red. I mean there is a reason why my daily uniform consists of skirts and dresses.

As I wrote this on the train a fellow lady lurker sitting next to me agreed. Sort of creepy, but it proves my point of how we are not receiving equal treatment. For that reason I will no longer use my DSL to head downtown if I don’t get it first. I’m pretty sure I can go a long time with no problems.

Another qualm I do have but I’ll give some slack for are those guys who do go down, and fail so miserably. A for effort, but F for sucking badly. It’s called eating out for a reason, so baby get a lil’ dirty and bon apetit. That’s all I have to say about that.

I don’t want to fall in love with you; I just want some good satisfaction. And then maybe I’ll fall in love with you.

So for those of you guys who want to do something right for the world I urge you all to start practicing, or read up on this. There is so much information you all severely lack, excluding Canada.

If you want us to go down in the darkness of a cheap movie theater, you got to realize that if we proceed to place our bare knees on sticky popcorn littered theater floor we do expect something in return.

And please MAN UP.

“Call before you come, I need to shave my chocha, go downtown, eat it like a vulture”. –Missy Elliot"

Zooey Deschanel vs Katy Perry

April 28, 2009

It's outrageous how much they look alike sometimes. One, I completely adore and love. The other is just annoying.


The Dude calls her "Zooey Douchebag"

Ferris Bueller & Carrie Bradshaw

are having twin girls via a surrogate mother. Strange.

Weekend

April 26, 2009

Larry and Dan Bob(okov) came to Baltimore to hang out with the Dude. I stayed in most of the time because I had TOO much work to do. We threw this plane I got the Dude off the roof.



The first day, the Dude came back with this.


Then the second day of shredding, he came back with this


and this


His tooth went THROUGH his lip. It was tough watching the footage of him beefing. Larry said it was strange even having that footage since the Dude never really falls..

In good news, I got a lot of my work done and Kink will be sending the Dude a new frame.

Terrorists

On Wednesday, my drawing class went to the airport to draw. We had to wear these neon vests for safety and we could not draw any security lines or security personnel. It was weird hanging out and exploring the airport on our own. I always thought I knew BWI pretty well since I'm in and out of it so much, but because I'm always going straight to the bag check, I never noticed that there's a "mall" and a "lounge area".



Chase Lisbon

Chase is showing at a gallery in Philly and the opening is this Saturday. Please attend if you are in the area.


This is the promo video.



After party:

Cash Cab

Here's Chase's Cash Cab episode! He's the one sitting in the back seat. I can't wait to see him next week.

Scott Schuman

When a bigtime movie star or politician dies someone like Tom Brokaw has always been there to help put it into perspective.

If it was a sports star, fans would talk about it for days on talk radio.

However, for someone that loves fashion Alexander McQueen is just gone and no one seems to be able to make sense of it.

There doesn't seem to be anywhere to turn to make it feel right or understandable.

I don't have any answers for you either. All I know is this sucks.



Here, we remember McQueen. Not just for a day.

Chuck Close

April 25, 2009



I got this email from the school the other day:

"Tent cards and posters have sprung up all over campus announcing a Chuck
Close lecture in Falvey Hall on Monday April 27th at 2 PM. Unfortunately,
rumors of Close's appearance have been greatly exaggerated; we do not know
who is responsible for these announcements but this event is not scheduled.
There is no Chuck Close lecture on the 27th nor, for that matter, is one
scheduled for the future.
"

HILARIOUS!

Cash Cab

April 24, 2009

Chase's Cash Cab episode aired today. It was AWESOME! And Reid's going to be on Judge Joe Brown. The people in my life are celebrities. HAHA!

Oppo marriage!

Where do they find these people? Let's not forget 2007's Miss South Carolina.

No posts

because I have a life! Sorry.

Really though, I've uber busy with school stuff right now. Lots of pictures and important FYI's to come though.

Shouts to the homies.

Soo many fun things coming up.

Grandma!

April 19, 2009

The guys that are calling probably think they're talking to a young and beautiful girl. Little do they know..

The Hipster Grifter

April 18, 2009

Read this article if you have a few minutes. Korean girls making other Korean girls look bad. The girl is loco. Boys better watch out with them NY/BK hipster crazies.


Photo from Amanda Qichao (I think)

Jump For Joy Contest

This is the footy from the contest the Dude and I went to last month. Larry Rhodes filmed and edited this edit.

DC Day again.. I might as well just move there..

NOT.

The Dude and I went to DC again. We drove into Adam's Morgan, visited some people, then tried to play at a school in the area, but the after school program didn't let out 'til 6:30, so we went to College Park and met up with Jesse and Ati.









We took the Metro into DC after riding College Park all day. DC at night was fun. We left Baltimore at 10:30am and didn't get back until 12:30am. It was fun riding around all day in another city. The only places I get to ride around are Baltimore and Severna Park, so it was nice riding around a "new" place.

Whole Wheat Chocolate Chip Banana Bread


Yum!

DC Day

April 16, 2009

Went to the Hirshhorn today to see the Strange Bodies exhibit and the Louise Bourgeois show. The Strange Bodies show was pretty cool. There was an Edward Kienholz/Nancy Reddin Kienholz piece that was awesome, a Philip Guston that I always love to see, Lucian Freud, and Francis Bacon. I love the basement shows they put together at the Hirshhorn.

The Louise Bourgeois show was overwhelming. I've never been encountered with that much of her work, but it was really nice to see the progression of her work and some things that I've never seen before. Her drawings from 2007 remind me of my work.. which a couple other people noticed.








There was also a Guston show on the top floor which I was suppper excited to see because I've never seen any of his drawings. A bunch of kids ran up the stairs and started going crazy in the room. It was funny to see a group of girls in pink in front of a Guston.



Then we went to the American Art Museums Portrait Gallery. One of the first things you see when you walk in are the "Featured Photographs" and guess who was one of the featured photographers?


His photos were from a Morrissey show. A photo in the collection of Patrick O'dell at a Morrissey concert.


And this is a Patrick O'dell photo at a Morrissey show.


I have no idea what point I'm trying to make.

Moz makes straight men gay for a half hour.

More AZNs

April 15, 2009

"In Shangdong Province, China, S.W.A.T members are in training on this economical gas saving device."

Oh so AZN

The Dude and I went to the Korean market today to get some goodies. It was overwhelming because he couldn't understand what anything meant, and I could only understand about half of it. He's also never had Korean food, so we sat down and got some dinner at the restaurant in the store.


Our plate of spicy rice cakes had swazi's on it.



iPhone pictures are blurry, but the food was good and the Dude loved it :) I was stoked.

Sometimes I look at the Dude and think he's so freaking sexy. So I have to capture that moment.